The scientific explanation for why guys can't get enough of bitches

Perhaps recently, you've noticed something strange about the Sunday Times Bestseller list. My book, entitled Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl — A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship, is listed alongside James Patterson, Barack Obama, and other notables.

My book seems to have gained popularity among a new generation of young women who are posting their reactions to it on the social media video app TikTok, propelling it to the top of the charts.

Why then has it resonated with Gen-Z women?

I'd like to briefly describe how women frequently interact with men before I respond to this question.

Imagine a society where gender roles are reversed. Imagine men cooking, cleaning, and spending hours in front of a mirror to try to look attractive.

Imagine if men texted a woman daily 12 times with the text "I miss you XOXO" and a pink heart emoji to express their desire for commitment after a week.

Men in character asked questions like, "Where is this relationship going," Additionally, "My biological clock is ticking"

To perform an act for you while wearing silk boxers and thigh-high boots, try to picture your partner enrolling in a pole-dancing class. Now, keep that in mind. Because women are taught to interact with men in this way

I wrote two best-selling books for women who are too nice, needy, nurturing, or available, Why Men Love Bitches (2003) and Why Men Marry Bitches (2017). Considering how we have been socially conditioned to behave, this includes many women.

Up until recently, the majority of my readers were females in their 30s, 40s, and 50s.

I spoke with hundreds of men, young and old, wealthy and poor, married and single, highly educated and working-class, before writing the books to learn all about their male secrets.

I questioned them, for example, "What really draws you?" Have you ever purposefully avoided a woman? Did her response make you want her more or push you away? What earns your admiration Does this influence your sexual inclination? A mental challenge is what The most pertinent query is, "Why do men love bitches?" '

I quickly realized that women have been totally deceived.

Men generally agreed that strong women were more attractive to them than yes-women who were submissive.

Men frequently realized they were falling in love with a woman when she stood up for herself.

Women have long been told that if they are attractive and perform the appropriate bedroom tricks, a man will take care of them and pay all the bills.

I never understood why a man would choose a less attractive woman who seemed less accommodating over a beautiful woman who would go out of her way to please him. However, men explained it to me, and I shared my book with their knowledge.

According to how some women behaved, it sent a loud and clear message to some men. I don't have my own opinions, including ones regarding my own value, it declared. You hold a special place in my heart. '

In the conversations I had with men, a woman's attractiveness had nothing to do with whether she wore Jimmy Choos or Louboutins or whether her hair was blonde or brunette. Even if he initially found her attractive, he would quickly grow tired of her if she exuded a desperate air.

One of the men I spoke with recalled how he first fell in love with his wife during their first kiss. But it was her independence and emotional restraint that made him fall in love with her, not the sex.

He picked her up, took her to dinner, and then they spent their first passionate night together in his apartment. She was gone when he awoke at 5 am. He searched for her in his car out of concern and discovered her nearby, briskly making her way to a bus stop. She was on her way home to change when she kindly informed him that she had to work that day. He wasn't necessary to take her anywhere.

Naturally, he insisted.

She had earned his respect by the time she buckled her seatbelt. Her actions communicated that she liked you but didn't need you and, more importantly, that her life was important to her and that she wouldn't put your needs ahead of her own. '

This sends a very different message than a woman who calls in sick to work, makes him breakfast in bed, and then cuddles him for two hours. That communicates to men, "I need you too much." 'It chokes them,'

My book offers guidance to today's young women that they might not have previously heard. Depressingly, Gen-Z girls can feel extremely unsafe on social media and in general when they are online.

Men can now easily get sex with a swipe of their finger thanks to online dating. Teenage girls are "sexting" naked pictures to boys, and some online dating sites give women ratings based on how attractive they are.

Men have created the euphemistic phrase "Netflix and chill" to describe what has replaced actual dates.

Young women may be reading about dignity, confidence, self-worth, and not giving themselves away to boys too soon for the first time when they come across my advice on TikTok for the first time. These are crucial lessons.

My message Never hesitate to advocate for yourself. The right man will increase your happiness, but no man can make you happy. He will want you more the less needy you are.

As they put it, men adore the "mental challenge" of a strong, independent woman. Never allow anyone to undermine your self-confidence.

Being a bitch doesn't necessarily imply being a jerk. It means being able to advocate for yourself.

I've been contacted by numerous TikTokers. For instance, Sarah Elizabeth questioned whether there was still a chance to follow the advice from the books after all of the mistakes had been made if you had already been "too nice" Can you ever be too late? '

Men can be interested one minute and bored the next, I said. When I was a guest on a London radio show, I asked the male host to name one womanly trait that would make him immediately dislike her.

Constant communication, he said. He would think a woman was too needy if she sent him pointless texts.

What if you suddenly stopped hearing from her, I then posed to him. He immediately responded, "I'd call her right away." '

Teenage girls can learn from my books what an overly protective father would say. Teenagers often disregard parental guidance, but I approach this as a friend, not a parent.

However, a father who read one of my books before giving it to his daughter summed up the impact of my books perfectly. I'd want my daughter to read your books, but I'd never want my wife to read them, he jokingly remarked. '